It's MY life, I can cry if I want to!

Today I wanted to cry. So I did. And I'm ok with it - even as a 29-year old. Life happens and emotions result, but for some reason, we are taught not to show certain emotions. Today, as a 29-year old, I cried and cried. I cried because cancer doesn't go away. I hold strong hope, remain positive and truly, truly believe that cancer heals, but the fear of the unknown doesn't go away. It is there when I wake, follows me through the day and accompanies me, along with special prayers, back to bed at night. Today, I accepted that as a 29-year old, I can be scared to death. It's ok. And so I cried. And cried. And cried. And cried.

And then, all of a sudden everything turned positive. My fear had turned to tears and without choice overflowed. But reflecting back, it was a good thing. Emotions happen just as life happens. And emotion -  fear, scare, anger, anxiety, happiness, cheer - are all ok. The healthiest part, is that I've learned through my struggles, that the more you hold back, the more backed up emotion becomes. I have experienced such back-up and suppression that I became slave to my own emotion. Not healthy.

It's my life, I can cry if I want to! So today I cried my eyes out. And I cried until I felt better. Might sound silly, or seem immature, may be interpreted as childish, but for me crying today was therapeutic. I cried all of my fear, anger and sadness away. The result, a carefree, happy me, living again. And it feels so GOOD!

Why judge emotions? God's tears make rainbows - of which are both so beautiful. So let loose, and then honor the joys life has to offer.